Leveraging Knowing AND Not Knowing

Practicing knowing and curiosity in our new home

By:Joy Goldman RN, MS, PCC:  CEO SixSEED Partners, BSN, ACC

Background:

At SixSEED Partners, we coach leaders in managing many seemingly competing priorities.  In healthcare, we like to KNOW.  Being the person who has the right answer is often seen as a strength, and many healthcare leaders are promoted for their problem-solving capacity.  What happens when you can’t know due to massive uncertainty (prevalent in our world) or because you are thrown into totally new territory?  Follow me on my journey adjusting to life in a new country.

Strategy:

Survival and happiness!  Two weeks’ ago, my husband, myself and three cats moved from our home of twenty-plus years to Portugal. We had leveraged learning and knowing over the past year as we completed documents and processes necessary for the move.  We had some inkling that it might feel a bit like Dorothy in her declaration of: “we’re not in Kansas anymore,” yet the beauty, peace, and access to the rest of Europe was propelling us forward. Once in Portugal, we were flooded with “not knowing.”  We don’t know how to speak nor understand the language; we don’t know what stores to go to for common, household items; we don’t know how to navigate the phones, mailing a letter home, reading food labels, and navigating the healthcare system.

The Solution:

Being immersed in this totally new and unfamiliar world, we must leverage the other pole of knowing:  we must leverage “not knowing” and curiosity.  We have to ask questions and rely on others and google translate to find our way.  As we work with leaders in healthcare on their development, there are two capacities which often are under-used and require humble practice:  asking for help (admitting not knowing) and leveraging an attitude of curiosity, wonder, and awe.  A healthy dose of humor also helps in navigating this terrain.  

Here in Portugal, we’ve had many Expats and native Portuguese residents help us in our learning.  There are times we will relapse and I will admit to being in tears at least once in my feverish desire to “know.”  And the moment passes and I channel humility and laughter to be able to say to myself: “Ah, yes: another opportunity to practice and learn!”

Impact:  

First and foremost, this capacity of leveraging knowing and not knowing helps improve and maintain a sense of wellbeing.  We tame our inner critic who is usually at-the-ready to barrage us with self-flagellation.

Secondly, the practice creates space for others to shine, offer what they know and to offer us support.  As a master care-giver, receiving is also an under-used muscle.  How glorious to be able to exercise that muscle in my new home.  Will you join me in the practice of “not knowing?”  I’d love to hear of your experiences.  You can let us know by going to www.sixseedpartners.com/contact.